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Thirty and Thriving.

Updated: Dec 7, 2021

A vital blog entry for everyone who seem to have lost hope in their situation, anxious millennials, and people who seek validity in living simply.
Living a successful simple life.

It’s 2021. This is the year I turn thirty.

Thirty supposed to be is when people are living a "successful life".

Meanwhile, I’m single, currently renting a house, unemployed, and trying to figure life out which started July 1991.

At my age, my mom cares after a 10-year-old daughter and a 6-year-old son, my father has visited numerous countries as seafarer, bought a house and car, sends us to private school, and provided us above and beyond perks. Here I am trying to survive and stepping out of their shadow.

Months before I turned 30, I rented a place. It’s year 2021 and yes, the world is still at war with CoViD. I didn’t have enough things to put in a 2-storey house. I only started with a few things I had (my clothes, a few appliances when I was living in a dorm) and a little courage to work out a plan. March 2021, I moved out of my parent’s house. Few months before my age turn 30.

“Start before you’re ready.”

Advice taken.

What do I do for a living?

I get paid to write scripts, and I’m rolling a small business.

Year 2020, I was supposed to go backpacking and live in my father’s province, Antique, Philippines, with barely known relatives whom I only met a few times during family reunion and vacation. Using this experience to come up with something: VideoBlog, novel, or a web blog. With lockdown restrictions, I needed a back-up plan to move-out of my parent’s home. Although living with my parents is such a blessing but I know I can’t be sheltered for the rest of my life. It’s now or never.

I felt like I owe it to my parent’s sacrifices that I live a stable life but out of employment. Company careers are 19th century invention of slavery. In another perspective, I am a lost soul figuring things out.

What did I do in my 20’s?

Age 20, I’m in a four-year relationship and counting, thinking that marriage is just around the curb. I was hired in my first full-time work in an audio-post production company. Even before I got my diploma, I landed a job that offers beyond what I expected. My friends were still studying in college while I’m already earning above entry-level salary. I lasted almost two years until I felt exhausted. As production coordinator back then, I had to work round the clock answering phone calls, send e-mails, and attend to film projects beyond work hours, work on weekends as needed. Although I was not after the money, there’s a feeling of missing out. Since I was eager to prove my self, I did all that I was told to do. Until words of a pastor on a Sunday Worship hit me, “You were born. You live. You study. you work. Get married. Give birth. Earn money. Die. You should spend your life serving God!” That time, there’s an open door for youth to serve in various ministries in the church I grew up with. I felt the burden to render service to God through full-time service in the church. So I passed my resignation effective immediately and adjust to a sacrificial life. My boyfriend is even supportive of my decision. Without receiving any salary and living in benefits and sponsorship, I felt more than enough and glad. My uncles were full-time ministers. They built a legacy by God’s grace, I was there almost in-line to follow their footsteps. Again, I was eager to give everything I could. I changed from being a reserved introvert to meeting other people’s expectation in the name of serving God.

Until toxicity and disappointment brought me to stage of depression and it hit me hard.

Age 28, I went back to my parent’s home and nested, picking up pieces of my shattered self. For a long time, I find it hard to translate how I felt into words. All I know is my parents were there to back me up. Not everyone gets enough support from their parents and I’m beyond grateful to be their child. My boyfriend also helped me get back on my feet. It’s when I learned who my real company were.

It’s sad to think that what we expect to happen did not.

What happened in my 20’s?

It was a period when I let myself experience life.

We build our plans, feel fulfilled, go through winding roads, meet the people who challenge and build us up.

What I learned in my 20’s?

Future is never certain. Enjoy NOW.

Do I regret anything?

It maybe a cliché but I believe everything happens for a reason. Everything happens for the good. My 20s is my molding period. Life is not supposed to be perfect, so why should we regret anything?

How I view my 30's?

  • It is not the finish line where I have to live the definition of “successful”.

  • It's when I can work on my potential as my service to God.

  • It’s a period where we learn by unlearning things that were taught to us when we were younger. We spend around 20 years attending school. It’s never too late to start a new norm: 30 is another book in sequel of life.

  • God has more in store than what we expect.

  • We mature by experience not by counting years. This makes me feel young.

  • I feel proud applauding other people’s achievement. I can browse through my social media newsfeed and like other people’s post about what makes them happy and what makes their day, and so on.

  • Life doesn’t have to go as we planned it to be. Predictability is boring. Unpredictability can be terrifying but challenging at the same time.

This way I never felt like I’m losing out. Everything is charged to experience.

Uncertainty will always be present because that’s how the future is.

This way I am never afraid to start all over again and not expect things to turn in my favor.

This way I don’t have to measure my achievement using other people’s standard.

This way I can do more.

This way I can forgive my stubborn self.

This way I give my self more time and space to grow.

This way I don’t need to answer all the questions that will only bring confusion.

This way I am able to:

claim my space. my peace. focus on what matters.

All these brought me to allow my self to be healthy physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Disciplined life came naturally and not pressed on me. I decided to be healthy, do activities that will allow my body be in its good condition, plant and harvest my crops which taught me to be patient, and spend my time less from the deep waters of social expectations.

I learned that small and big progress are all drops of water in our pitcher that makes us who we are.

What I’m starting to do in my 30s?

While starting all-over again may sound difficult, lonely, and discouraging, here are a few things I tried to work on and keep in mind.

  • Live Simply Living a simple life is a powerful self-growth and development tool that enables people to find their true selves, which in turn leads to a more fulfilling life. Living simply is not about giving up all the things we enjoy, it's about finding balance. When we live simply we can focus on what matters most to us and spend less time fussing over everyday things. In today's world, people are constantly caught up in a cycle of work and stress. The pursuit of success and the need to be productive for others' sake has left people feeling drained and without a sense of self worth. Those who find a way to break the cycle may find themselves more fulfilled and productive than they have been before. People who live simply are those who take time for themselves. They establish their own boundaries, refuse to let others dictate their lives, and prioritize the needs of their own in order to give a part of them to others. For starters, I cut down my wardrobe into wearing the same kind of shirt so I don’t have to spend time and energy thinking about what to wear daily.

  • Build Routine A huge part of self-growth and development is the ability to enjoy yourself and your life. That is why we need to develop a routine that can help us live and enjoy our lives and grow as individuals. It's not just about what we do, but also about how we do it. Instead of going on a hunt for a new goal, we should focus on what we already have going for us first before adding more things on our plate. Start with a stubborn plan and be flexible with your methods. It’s good to learn from your mistakes then adjust to things as necessary.

  • Prioritize health We should also be aware of how our lifestyle can affect our mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual aspects. We should start by being mindful of what our bodies absorb from what we eat, what we hear, what we see, as we expose ourselves to all these and it affects and influences our aspects of living. I am not here to encourage you what diet you should keep but to remind you to look again in the spectrum and ask yourself, “is this certain thing healthy for me? We should be aware of the food we put in our body. We need to do activities that will improve our physique. We need to keep in touch with people who will help us meet our best self; whose thoughts and ideas challenge us to do better. Lastly, saying no to commitments that don’t serve you.

  • Maintain clean space and things. A clean environment is important for your health. It provides support for a healthy body and sound thinking. When your environment is clean, well-sorted and nice, you experience a perpetual state of happiness. This leads to an increased feeling of creativity and well-being which in turn leads to better productivity. Satisfaction with your environment boosts your confidence. This means you feel good, even if not everything is perfect. No more depression or anxiety! I always start and finish with clean space. Washing utensils right after I use them, disinfecting the kitchen counter after I cook, do my laundry regularly, and mop the floor every night before going to bed. Living alone and without a maid seems tiring having to do these chores. Guess what, it’s only tiring when you think about it. As soon as you act on them, you'll feel a sense of fulfillment doing them.

  • Wake up early without alarm. Confident that everything is in order, I wake up looking forward to spend a good day ahead. I witness the sun rise and enjoy its ray without having my clock to tell me to. Each day starts with a clean slate in meditation and prayer entrusting everything to God. Waking up without having to think about the stress of work is energizing. I enjoy my self and have fun conquering the peace within and sharing that peace I conquered to others I get in touch to.

As soon as I embody the above mentioned, the following things came after:

  • Enjoy the presence of family and friends.

  • Prepare my self healthy meals.

  • Monetize my passion.

  • Responsible to pay the bills.

I am proud of my age and the experiences that came along with it.

Thriving and trying new things and opportunities.

I'd like to encourage readers like you to be grateful in the challenges you went through.

Use it as stepping stone to build a better version of your self.


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